Has your bedtime routine turned into a song and dance (literally)? Let’s look at the TikTok topic called Bedtime Math.
By Nicole Fuge, Mama Disrupt® Managing Editor
When it comes to kids, there’s one thing our tiny overlords need to hit the zzz’s – the almighty bedtime routine. But it’s not just about PJs and fairytales. Nope, it’s a full-blown ritual that’s gotta be on-point every. single. night.
Miss out one cuddle or swap the story order, and boom. Sleep is canceled.
I made this mistake last week – I put on relaxing sleep music for my kids before I turned the lights off – and now this needs to happen night after night after night. Oh, and they need to choose the music themselves… FML.
“LAY YOUR KID DOWN, KISS ON THE FOREHEAD, [SAY] SWEET DREAMS AND GET THE F*CK OUT OF THAT BEDROOM. WHERE THE CRAZY BEDTIME MATH COMES IN IS WHEN YOU START STACKING HABITS.”
Welcome to the world of Bedtime Math
On social media, the bedtime routine has become a hot topic, after TikTokker @boldfam made up a brilliant name for this sh*tshow – Bedtime Math.
“Bedtime Math starts as a simple equation. You lay your kid down, kiss on the forehead, [say] ‘sweet dreams’ and get the f*ck out of that bedroom. Where the crazy bedtime math comes in is when you start stacking habits.
“You go in there one night and you add ‘sleep tiiiight, don’t let the bed bugs bite’. Guess what you’re going to do the next day? You’re going to do that whole song and dance again.
“Soon you’re going to be up till 3 in the morning doing the goddamn Macarena for your kid because you don’t know how to shut up. Stop introducing them to bedtime routines, it will never ever end. EVER.”
But in all seriousness – we might giggle at how these pint-sized divas insist on every detail (like, do we really need the third teddy?), but deep down, we get it. It’s their snug little safety net in this big, big world. And let’s be real – isn’t there something totally lush about them finding comfort in the predictability amidst our chaotic #mumlife?
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