By Sian Yewdall
As a #bossmama it is common to experience the tug-o-war between your head and your heart when you’re on a mission to build a business from scratch – it really is a mind f*ck at times!
If you’re someone who’s kept quiet and played nice for most of her life, it’s time to grow some balls and build that thriving business… promote yourself and own your dreams without any apology. It is possible to win this battle, mama, just be aware of the mind games that are working behind the scenes to sabotage your success.
1 // Stop saying you’re sorry
Do you apologise for wanting or having a business? Do you say sorry or feel guilty when you explain a business idea or talk about creating a new life as a result of your business? STOP. What are you sorry for? Who said you can’t have those things or work for your dreams? Ain’t no-one going to give you permission unless you give it to yourself first.
2 // Quit sending mixed messages
Your lack of confidence and ability to commit is sending mixed messages to your family, friends and yourself. How can you achieve something if you can’t make the decision to go after it? The lack of clarity and focus is diminishing your power and you’re more likely to quit before you even get started.
3 // Don’t dismiss your dreams
When you belittle your business as a ‘hobby’ or ‘a bit of fun’ you are telling yourself your dreams aren’t valuable enough to share. While you don’t have to tell everyone your grand vision, there is no harm in clearly stating what it is you do and why you do it. There will always be people ready to cut you down to size, but don’t be one of them yourself.
4 // Stop playing small
When it comes to building your business it’s important to connect with new audiences and promote your work to reach your ideal customers, but when you play small, you find ways to stay inside your comfort zone and do what’s easy. Take the plunge and join a networking group or meet other women who are doing what you do, understand your dreams and can cheer you on to play bigger. There is safety in numbers.
5 // Don’t give your power to others
While talking to others about your business can help keep you accountable, be mindful of enabling others to persuade you off course or confuse you with their negative opinions. If you need genuine feedback about your business idea, new product or service, conduct a survey among your customers, business Facebook groups or ask someone who fits your customer demographic and gain valuable insights you can actually use.
6 // Live in the now
Arguably the most sabotaging of all mind games is when you bring any hurt or pain from past experiences into your decision making process for the future. You are not your past. This is your time to decide which way you’re going and reclaim the woman you really are. Write down all those negative beliefs about yourself or words used by others to describe you and actively work on releasing those. Create new stories that serve you more positively. You deserve more #bossmama!
7 // Be wary of Impostor Syndrome
“Who am I to do this?” “I don’t have the experience.” “I’m not an expert.” “I will just wait until my kids are older and I have more time.” What you’re really telling yourself is, you don’t feel good enough. FYI Richard Branson, Tony Robbins and Sara Blakely had zero experience when they started their business… you have everything you need to make it happen. You’ve got this.
8 // Watch your language
Should. Wish. Hope. The three words you need to drop from your vocabulary stat, as they only work to keep you small and tell your brain that you’re not genuine about building a successful business. You CAN and you WILL.